Going through the breakup was hard enough, and now your ex has refused to let go. You are ready to move on—not necessarily to someone new but away from this person.
So what do you do when he’s making it difficult by continuing to reach out and trying to “stay friends” regardless of your lack of interest?
Here are simple tips to gain the clean break you desire:
1. Make it clear you want him or her out of your life
You have said it—in so many words (you didn’t want to be mean, and how many other ways are there to interpret “It’s over”?). But when someone you used to date won’t let it go, you have to be as blunt as possible, without being cruel of course.
Put a call through, don’t text, in order to avoid any misunderstanding. It sometimes does more hurt than help when you try to sugarcoat it, so don’t. Be as straightforward as possible; use the most direct wording—short and to the point—in this situation. You could say, “Please stop contacting me.” Don’t be afraid of being ‘mean.’ You are firmly establishing what you need, and he of she needs to honour that.
2. Have an all-round social media clean-up
Social media has a way of bringing up memories between you and that ex-boyfriend or girlfriend. In order to avoid being tossed back such euphoria, it is best to avoid having them on any of your social media pages; start by unfollowing (and blocking) them from any access into what goes in and around your life.
3. Do not respond to any of his or her communication
This can be really difficult, especially if you still care for that person. After you have made your boundaries clear, do not respond if he or she reaches out again. Even by responding to the“Hey, thinking of you” text with an “I’m good, hope you are well, too” adds fuel to the fire of ‘staying in touch’ with you. So cut the cord, and don’t respond.