Fights can break a relationship. But there’s an obverse to this statement as well – if you fight fair, arguments can strengthen a relationship and iron out differences.
In other words, all disagreements between partners aren’t bad – they bring festering issues in a relationship out in the open and provide both partners with an opportunity to reveal their innermost feelings to each other.
Counsellors say that if you are planning to get hitched, the more you fight about certain things before the nuptials, the better will be your understanding of each other’s perspectives. Just remember to pick your battles wisely.
Here 4 crucial issues to fight about before getting married:
1. Social media behaviour
If you do not like the fact that your partner is prone to plastering his/her social media timelines with updates on your relationship, sort the issue out. Your partner may justify his/her propensity for baring all on social media, but do not shy away from expressing your reservations. Similarly, if your partner objects to you stalking your ex on social media, this can be one argument that can help you both to devise a post-marriage social media strategy.
2. A row over having kids
This issue needs to be discussed before tying the knot. When do you want to be pregnant? How many kids do you want? Do you want to adopt at a certain point? What if you want to be childless by choice? If there are disagreements on any of these points, it’s better to argue about this before marriage and put the matter to rest.
3. All about career choices
This can be a thorny issue post-marriage. What if, one of the partners has to move to a different city for work? What if, one of you decide to quit a job and do something on your own – how will the house economics play out in that case? Of course, you can say that you’d cross the bridge when you come to it. But a bit of honest pre-marriage discussion about career choices won’t hurt.
4. Sharing and caring
Both of you need to be on the same page when it comes to apportioning household chores to each other. If your partner is a traditionalist, believing that cooking and washing are not a man’s job then there can be trouble in your paradise. So, this is one argument you must have before taking the marriage route.
