It really is difficult to escape all the pitfalls that come with sleeping with a close friend. Opposites ex friendships are usually all well and good , really, until s.e.xual attraction builds up and s.e.x sneaks into the picture.
“Oh, we are mature” and “it’s just s.e.x, we can always handle ourselves,” are the well-used responses you get from people who have been going down with their friends.
But here’s the thing, no matter how chill or mature you think you are, you can’t escape all the pitfalls that come with sleeping with a friend.
So before you do it with that close friend, here are some of the awkward moments and problems you really should consider.
1. When they get someone else
So you sleep with them and a new partner comes into the picture shortly after. That awkward moment when she introduces you to the new guy as her close friend but you both know you are not just a good friend. And then there’s the problem of that partner finding out later that he/she isn’t just your friend.
So you’re faced with confessing and losing one of your friend or partner, or facing that awkward moment when your partner confronts you with the truth that he/she found out from someone else.
2. Recurrence
The understated struggle that comes out of this kind of situation is how to minimise the ‘damage’ that has been done.
Quite a number of first-time friends s.e.x happen in moments of rashness or uncontrolled excitement and friends would ideally love to keep it at that single time, but to continue being friends and keep the s.e.x from recurring is one helluva difficult task you’d better avoid.
3. Opinions and judgements become questioned
It becomes strange to go to this person, who you slept with, to talk about your heartbreaks and dating life.
It used to be normal and OK to seek their opinions before the s.e.x happened, but not anymore. Their opinion somehow appears coloured by personal interests in you.
4. Pure intentions?
You also call their actions to question. Whatever he or she does might get interpreted as a calculated move to get back in bed with you – especially if the first time was really bomb.
5. Things won’t be the same again
Seven out of 10 times, you won’t be able to get your friendship back to what it was before.
Once you go down that thin road, that relationship dynamic changes. Usually from good to bad.
