The idea of a man being less interested in sex than his partner may sound unusual at first glance but a little consideration would show that it is really not as uncommon as it seems.
Low libido in men is not uncommon. In fact, about 1 in 4 men (28 per cent) A 2012 survey by the International Society for Sexual Medicine says that one on every four men experiences a low sexual desire.
Placed side by side the libido of women, Dr. Irwin Goldstein, one of the study’s authors and director of sexual medicine at Alvarado Hospital in San Diego, says “nearly 30 per cent of women say they’re more interested in sex than their male partner.”
Even though it’s not conclusive evidence, this still further lends credence to the reality that you could really be in a relationship with a man whose sex drive is nowhere near yours.
You would be so wrong to assume that a man’ sex drive would be higher than yours by default.
If you ever get in a relationship with someone whose libido is lower than yours, this is what to expect such relationship to feel like:
1. You may struggle with self esteem
“We have a great relationship, he makes me laugh constantly and we’re pretty much on the same page about everything in life. The only thing I’m struggling with is his lower sex drive.
“We’ve spoken about it loads and he’s promised it’s just how he is and it’s not me, but my self-esteem has taken a massive knock and I’m finding it hard to believe the things he says are true.”
The above is an excerpt from Mariella Forstrup’s Agony Aunt column of The Guardian UK, and although the woman who owns the story is British, she’s not the only woman facing this and hers is a relatable story here or anywhere.
The feeling of being unwanted and the questioning of your sex appeal is the exact kind of energy that could exist in a relationship where your man is constantly uninterested in physical intimacy, or attending to it as if it’s such kind of chore.
2. Tension and resentment could be a thing
Feeling unwanted and having pent up sexual tension is one of the things that you are likely to deal with when your man’s libido is below yours.
This obviously opens the door to tension, resentment and other bitter, toxic forms of energy in the relationship.
3. You’ll have to ask what you really want
This is a question you’ll have to ask and determine very quickly. Do you want to stay in that relationship? Do you want to stay right there and deal with all the different dimensions that such relationship comes with? The earlier you decide this, the better for everyone.
4. …Because the temptation to cheat will feel heightened
It won’t matter that you love this person, and it won’t also matter that they love you back. Having your sexual needs unmet or inadequately met could really test your faithfulness is really difficult ways.
5. DIY
Deciding to stay in the relationship regardless of the mismatched sexual energy you have with a man means one or more of the following:
– you’ll stick with him and together seek ways to raise his libido levels
– you’ve decided to not cheat
– the right amount of sex is a something you are willing to give up to be in the relationship
– you are willing and ready to engage in a lot of DIY orgasms and sexual gratification.
