If you’ve been feeling trapped in the whirlwind of your ups and downs in terms of your bond with your family, here are 5 reasons that may bring you some closure:
1. Lack of communication
As cliché as it may sound, communication is the key. Well, all healthy relationships depend on how we use our words and when we use them. A lack of open communication can create space to make assumptions for both parents and the child. For example, an honest conversation about which friend you are going to hang out with today will prevent parents from assuming the worst-case scenarios. This can help prevent misunderstandings, keep them worry-free, and prevent them from making 100 calls to you during a movie.
2. Differing expectations
Every parent wants their child to be successful. They want the best for them, and that’s where some parents go overboard with their protective and pushy nature. This may leave the child feeling good-for-nothing and disoriented at times. As your parents expect you to live the life they want for you, things don’t often go as per the charted plan. Some children seek freedom to find their own path with a little guidance from parents, and that’s when the expectations of parents feel crushed. The difference in these expectations can cause disappointment and frustration for both parents and children. If these expectations aren’t expressed and sorted in time, they may cause an ongoing scuffle between both.
3. Past conflicts and unresolved issues
Unresolved issues can haunt us often and create resentment between parents and children. Disagreements over certain things like dressing sense, subjects to pick, or who to be friends with can make the child go into a shell and never open up to the parents. These unresolved problems can create a barrier to closeness between parent and child. If you’re not ready to address these past conflicts and heal from them, it can impact your relationship with your parents indefinitely and create that dent preventing trust from building.
4. Emotional distance and unavailability
Unavailability from parents during the tender age of a child when they need them the most may make a child emotionally distant during the later years. This can also happen to a parent when the child is emotionally unavailable. Not being present can be due to many factors like work pressures, stress, depression, or personal conflicts between the parents, which may leave a child often unattended. This unavailability at crucial moments in life can lead to abandonment issues, neglect, misunderstandings, and create a rift in your relationship with your parents.
5. Generation gap and differing values
The generation gap is a real thing, and it is one of the root causes of an inconsistent relationship with parents. Differing values, beliefs, and views can cause debates among parents and children. Parents with more traditional core values and children with a modern approach may often find it difficult to stay in the same room for long. If these issues are not addressed, they can create disagreements and misunderstandings. These divergent ideals have the potential to cause a rift in relationships, making it challenging to sustain steady and peaceful ones if they are not handled with compassion and respect.
