Many people struggle to figure out whether someone’s behaviour means they are interested romantically or if they are simply being kind.
This confusion happens because flirting and being nice can look very similar. Small gestures, compliments, or even a smile can be hard to read. This can leave you feeling unsure and wondering what their real intentions are.
To avoid any awkward situations or misunderstandings, you’ll need to learn how to tell the difference, and we’ll help you clear up the confusion by giving you signs to look out for that can help you understand whether they’re flirting or just being nice.
1. The tone of their compliments
One way to tell if someone is flirting or just being nice is by paying attention to how they compliment you.
If they are complimenting you in a friendly way, they might say things like, “You’re a really kind person,” or “You’re good at your job.” These are simple, polite remarks. However, if they’re flirting, their compliments might be more personal, like “You look amazing today,” or “I can’t stop thinking about your smile.” Flirting focuses on appearance or intimacy, while being nice sticks to general kindness.
2. Body language
Body language can give you many clues about whether someone is flirting or just being nice. If they are leaning in when they talk to you, making prolonged eye contact, or lightly touching your arm, it could be a sign of flirting. These actions show interest and connection. On the other hand, if they keep a friendly distance, smile casually, and avoid touching you, they are probably just being polite.
3. Teasing or joking
People who are flirting might tease you or make playful jokes as a way to create a fun and flirty atmosphere.
Light teasing can be a way of showing interest and getting your attention. If they are joking with you in a friendly but personal way, it’s a sign they might be flirting. However, if the jokes are more general or they are treating you the same way they treat others, it could mean they’re just being friendly.
4. Constant attention
Flirting comes with more frequent attention. If they are texting you often, finding excuses to talk to you, or giving you special treatment compared to others, it’s likely that they are flirting.
They might go out of their way to check in on you or spend extra time with you. If they are nice but treat you the same way as everyone else, then they’re probably just a friendly person.
5. How they act around others
A good way to tell if someone is flirting is by noticing how they act around other people. If they act the same way with everyone, it’s likely they are just being nice. But if their behaviour changes when they’re around you—they seem more focused, nervous, or excited—then they could be flirting. People tend to act differently when they’re romantically interested in someone.
