Love bombing is a technique of psychological abuse where a person shows excessive acts of love and attention to someone else to influence and control them.
It may sound antithetical, but love bombing is used to lower people’s guard early into a relationship and make them more vulnerable to control and manipulation over time.
1. They are constantly available
Although this seems like a sign of commitment, constant availability and excessive interest in your life can be a cause of concern. Love bombers tend to use affection as a means for gaining people’s trust. To differentiate between genuine affection and love bombing, establish clear boundaries with your partner. If they continue to cross these limits to win you over, it might be a sign of love bombing.
2. They give you excessive gifts
Some people express love through gift-giving and acts of service that make their partner’s day brighter. However, when these gifts become grandiose and concerningly frequent, it may be an attempt at love bombing. These gestures are meant to make you so overwhelmed with affection that you fail to recognise the signs of manipulation in the relationship.
3. They rush into big milestones
One of the biggest signs of love bombing is your partner rushing you into big milestones. This can also look like making expensive purchases together, introducing you to important people in their life, and talking about a lifelong bond very early in the relationship. To avoid being love bombed, assert the pace at which you want to progress with your partner.
4. Their intensity makes you uneasy
You might find yourself wondering why your partner showing love and attention to you is making you uncomfortable. If you find that your partner is being worryingly intense about your relationship, communicate your feelings without being afraid of confrontation. Love bombers can take advantage of your lack of communication to sway you further.
5. They feel entitled to your attention
Love bombers leverage their actions to make you reciprocate excessive attention to them. Being overly available for your partner can make you isolated from other aspects of your life, like your hobbies, friendships and interests. This can make you easier to manipulate as the relationship progresses. If you feel like your partner asks you to be present for them constantly, communicate your capacity to them gently.
6. They can’t take no for an answer
Love bombers rely on the fact that their intense admiration makes it difficult for you to say no to them. If you find that your partner cannot respect your boundaries and take no for an answer, ask yourself if you are being love bombed. A healthy relationship involves both partners respecting each other’s feelings and comfort zones.
7. They are jealous of other people in your life
A common recurrence with love bombing is the attempt to isolate you from the support systems in your life. This is a trait found in many manipulative partners, as it can prevent you from seeking advice and help about your relationship from your friends and family. This can happen if your partner always insists on meeting you alone or asks you not to see your loved ones.
