1. Undermining each other’s feelings
The most important aspect of a healthy relationship is listening to and respecting your partner’s emotions. You might not always have the solution to all your partner’s problems, but simply being present for them emotionally goes a long way. Never say phrases like “You’re overreacting” or “It’s not that serious” about their emotions. A relationship where both partners do not have the space to express themselves without judgment or criticism can breed resentment and secrecy.
2. Ignoring each other’s privacy
Trust is the foundation of a healthy relationship, which is why respecting each other’s privacy should be a non-negotiable boundary. Most people have differing ideas of what is okay in a relationship and what is not, which makes setting boundaries important. Instead of breaching your partner’s privacy and going through their personal items, emails, or text messages, practice healthy communication and ask them about your concerns instead. Not having privacy in a relationship can cause significant stress and damage your bond.
3. Keeping each other out of the loop
Maintaining your privacy is one thing, and keeping your partner out of the loop is another. Making big decisions related to finances, parenting, and jobs without consulting your partner can erode trust in your relationship. Have an open discussion about major life decisions with your partner. Clear communication can help you both feel more secure in the relationship and avoid any tension or mistrust.
4. Using love as a test
Withholding affection from your partner to fulfill your demands can create an extremely unhealthy dynamic between you and your partner. If there is something that you would like to change in your relationship, be open with your partner and work towards it. Getting your partner to change their ways to ‘prove’ their love will not establish any trust and understanding between you two and can even create a gap in your relationship.
5. Violating each other’s personal space
In a healthy relationship, both partners have the space to explore their own interests and unwind. A lack of personal space in a relationship can make people feel suffocated and even controlled. The demand for constant availability and attention from a partner can also be a sign of a codependent relationship. Despite how close you are to each other, you and your partner should discuss and set boundaries to protect your personal spaces.
6. Dismissing each other’s personal lives
A relationship involves two individuals with their own interests, hobbies, and friendships. A healthy relationship allows both partners to have their own personal lives and achieve their goals. Dismissing your personal life in a relationship can make you feel neglected and even result in a loss of identity. Make sure that you and your partner establish a balance between each other’s personal lives and respect them.
7. Being disrespectful
A healthy relationship is built on respect. Belittling your partner’s interests, ideas, or feelings, especially in front of other people, can have serious consequences for their esteem and make them feel hesitant to share things with you. You might find your partner’s ideas wrong or silly sometimes, but the way to go is to discuss these issues with them rather than mocking them and shutting down communication.
8. Using the silent treatment
You may not realise it, but the silent treatment can be a serious red flag. Refusing to communicate a problem with your partner and instead ignoring them can only result in creating feelings of stress and hostility. It is important to clearly and honestly communicate the issues in your relationship rather than using roundabout ways to deal with them. Remember that ignoring a problem does not make it go away.
