A mistress often referred to as the ‘side chick’ in South Africa is any other woman in your partner’s life especially one with whom he engages in s3xual activity and every other stuff he should only be doing with you.
Surprisingly a good number of married men in this clime have one or two side chicks with the excuse of ‘men are polygamous in nature.
Some even go ahead to say things like, ‘you get tired of eating one particular dish so you need to have something different at some point.
Others would say, ‘we are only trying to help the number of side ladies’ and many other absurd things they get say.
Below are five rules you must adhere to in dealing with your spouse’s side chick:
1. Carry out a proper investigation about your partner’s side chick
Be sure your partner is really cheating on you by carrying out due investigation on the matter.
It’ll be the greatest injustice to your spouse to confront him over allegations of extramarital affairs when in truth nothing of such exists.
And yes, if really he has a side chick, get facts about her, what she looks like, how she met your partner how deep they’re involved and so on. This is just in a bid to arm yourself with sound proof that your man is being unfaithful.
2. Resist the temptation of confronting the side chick
This is one thing most women get wrong. They go confrontational with their man’s side chick which should never be.
As a matter of fact, you really have no business with the side chick, the one who needs ‘talking to’ is your man.
3. Subtly confront your partner about the matter
In a subtle manner, inform your partner you know about his affair with proof. Whatever his responses, ensure you have your emotions under control. As this isn’t the time to allow it get the better part of you.
If he denies the act despite the glaring evidence you have presented, you must still stay and peradventure he accepts; you need to inquire why he chose that part and talk things out.
4. In-between seek marriage counseling
At this point, to help your mental state, it’s best you speak with a marriage counselor and any other expert to health your sanity.
If you are very interested in keeping your marriage as a result of the love you may have for your spouse, it’s best he’s also involved in the counseling section.
There you both are able to pour out your minds to a marriage expert who suggests and chart a course on how to go about revamping your union if possible.
5. Make a decision
Depending on your partner’s reaction after a counseling section if he shows signs of turning a new life, that means you both are on the part to reliving to good times again without a third party. But you must be sure that’s what you truly want and what would give you genuine happiness.
However, if he shows no sign of being remorseful, you would need to take a seat back and possibly move away from the house and possibly seek a divorce if the union is irredeemable.
But should you decide to stay back while you hope for a change, you would need to protect yourself by avoiding unprotected intercourse with him; that’s if you even have to at all. Ensure you undergo a medical checkup to check for any STI, STD and get treatment if needed.
