It’s common for our minds to wander during sex, but what are we mostly thinking about?
Sexual wellness brand Lovehoney conducted research to find out what people are really thinking about when they have sex.
They surveyed over 2,000 adults to find out their most common sexual thoughts. Here’s what they discovered about dominant sexual thoughts:
1. “This is so good… or this is so bad.”
The survey has revealed that the most common thought to have during sex is about whether the sex is good or not, with 80% of people admitting to being distracted by this in the bedroom.
2. He or she isn’t doing it right
Almost two-thirds of those surveyed (61%) admitted to thinking about all the things they wish their partner would do that they don’t currently. This is the second most common thought: if this happens a lot, there’s work to be done when it comes to communication, and the sex isn’t that good.
It’s not unusual to entertain thoughts of enhancing your sexual life. In fact, a considerable 52% of individuals have also contemplated the idea of incorporating sex toys into their intimate experiences with a partner.
3. How much longer will this last?
It’s not so surprising that 53% of men also think about how to not finish too quickly, while 57% of women are focused on when they might get to orgasm.
Whether they desire a longer-lasting experience or are eager to reach the climax swiftly, it is not uncommon for individuals to fantasize about the duration of their sexual encounters. In fact, a resounding 53% of respondents confessed to being preoccupied with thoughts of how much longer the sex will be.
4. Household chores, work, and food
It’s also not uncommon to be distracted by our daily lives while having sex. 29% of people have admitted they often think about what household chores need doing, 27% are planning their next meal, and 24% of adults are even thinking about work.
5. Other people
While having sex with their partners, 36% of people fantasize about having sex with someone else.
If you’ve ever felt bad about thinking about someone else while having sex, you’re not alone, according to new research.
During sex, nearly two-in-five (38%) of respondents have thought about having sex with someone other than their partner, and 36% have actually fantasized about having sex with someone else during sex with their partners. This varies somewhat between men and women, with 27% of women confessing to considering having sex with someone else, compared to 36% of men.
Another interesting fact is that 27% of men think about their favourite sports team during sex with their partner.
How to be less distracted during sex
Ness Cooper, a Clinical sexologist, shared ways to improve sexual satisfaction among couples. Cooper suggests exploring new things and learning new ways as a way to enjoy stimulation. “Newness during sex can also help individuals express their individual differences. Also, sex toys can offer variations in sensations and stimulation, inspiring new forms of sexual play.”
Engaging in some sort of dialogue or conversation is a good way to ensure you are not distracted and you are both clearly communicating.