8 things no one tells you about s*x after childbirth



You’ve gone through conception, pregnancy and birth, and now the baby is here.

With all the changes that’s going on in your life, sex is probably the last thing on your mind – but there will come a time when that will change.

That’s just the physical side of things – there’s a lot more about sex after a baby that nobody tells you.

Here are eight things you might want to know.

1. You can get pregnant again immediately

And I mean, immediately – it doesn’t matter whether you are breastfeeding or if your periods haven’t started again. If you’re back at it and you are not using contraception, you could be welcoming another little baby in nine months time.

2. Your sex drive can disappear

You might want to have sex again but thanks to the hormone changes in your body, your libido may have other ideas. It tends to swap its stockings and suspenders for stretch pants and the sofa, and it can take time to coax it back out again.

3. His sex drive can disappear

He is man. Man like hunting. Man like sex. Right? Some men can experience a dip in testosterone after their baby is born and that can lead to a drop in their libido too, which can be rather convenient.

4. The idea of intercourse can freak you out

‘A baby has just come out of my vagina and now you’re expecting me to put something sexy back in it?’ Sex and birth can seem like two planets, on opposite sides of the universe, and your brain can struggle to bridge the gap. It’s both ironic and logical.

5. Your breasts can leak milk when you’re aroused

If you’re breastfeeding, the same hormone that helps with ‘let-down’ of the milk can be released when you’ve got the horn. So you may get an occasional bit of extra when the going gets hot. Be prepared!

6. Sex can hurt

Traumatic birth, stitches, surgery and a pelvic floor weakened by nine months of baby carrying can all make sex painful for months or even years after having a baby. Postnatal hormones can also cause a bit of dryness in the vaginal canal. Isn’t parenthood glorious? But help is at hand – doctors can refer you for surgery, physio or counselling as required.

7. Having sex with your baby in the room is just weird

They have no clue what is going on, of course, but it’s another psychological hurdle to get over, and one which no one really talks about.

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