The average age to marry is unique and different across the world.
But what is the right age to get married? And how can you ever tell if you’re too young to marry?
The questions are many, but you know the truth, right? You can marry at any age, as long as both of you are in love.
Or wait a minute, is it so simple? Can you really marry at any age, as long as you’re truly and deeply in love with each other?
No, you can’t. Unfortunately, a successful marriage takes more than just true love to succeed.
Are you ready to marry?
Many people wonder if being eighteen or nineteen or even twenty is too young to get married. But there are so many things you have to consider.
The right age to get married is a tricky way of looking at the problem. While the average age of marriage in several countries can give you some pointers, it’s not really personalized to give you the right answer.
What is the right age to get married?
Here are five pointers that everyone who wants to get married has to look into. While being too young to get married can seem like a scary factor, there are bigger things to consider. So irrespective of whether you’re eighteen or twenty five, ask yourself these questions. And if you’re unsure of even one of these pointers, it’s probably not the best age to get married, for you or your partner.
You really have to consider all these options before getting married, or you may end up in an unhappy relationship, or worse, destroy yourself physically and emotionally.
Do you have the financial stability?
Is this the right age for you to get married? Getting married is a commitment that’s beyond sharing popcorn and watching movies, or going out for dinner dates. While your life doesn’t really change after marriage, a marriage brings with it a sense of financial responsibility. You can’t really ask your dad to give you a week’s allowance or pocket money. Are you ready to take on that burden of looking after yourself and your new family?
Are both of you earning enough in steady, well paying jobs to live comfortably and manage any sudden expenses that come along the way?
Are both of you emotionally mature?
The average age of marriage in your country will not affect your emotional maturity. It’s for you to decide. You may be partying late, having a lot of fun, and not worrying about what you’re going to do the next morning. But for two people to live with each other happily as a married couple, you need to be emotionally mature.
You may have had a lot to deal with over your teenage years, like college assignments, dating, errands, meeting your friends, and tons of other stuff. Now, you’re going to have to deal with twice as much, because you have a partner who is going to have their own share of problems too. Can you handle that? You can’t really shut your room door and lock yourself anymore.
Your mum isn’t going to be outside your room door after cleaning the mess you created. Once you’re married, no matter how difficult life gets, you can’t shut your problems away. You have to face it like a mature person. Are you ready for that? Is your lover ready for that?
Are you ready to compromise in the relationship?
Love your playstation? Love talking for hours on the phone? Or love just sitting back on the couch and swishing beer cans into the bin? Are you ready to give it all up for the sake of your relationship? What about food habits, sleeping habits and how long either of you take in the bathroom?
A marriage looks cute from the outside, but in real life, marriage is about love and compromise. And this compromise should come naturally. Many people in failing marriages say marriage is nothing but a compromise, and a give-and-take relationship. But that’s far from the truth.
Marriage isn’t about compromise, love is. And it comes from the heart. You shouldn’t compromise to put up with your partner, you should do it only if it genuinely makes you happy. Lovers like pleasing each other with little acts of kindness and love, because it brings each other more joy and happiness. Are you ready to compromise for each other? Remember, you’re going to live with each other now, and you’re going to be sharing a lot more than a few hours every day.
Can you handle your lover’s shortcomings?
Now, as perfect as either of you are, none of us are entirely perfect. We come with our own packages of good and bad. Good is wonderful and sweet. But can you handle the bad? Can you handle it if your partner snores? Or gets up at three in the morning because they’re hungry? Or leaves the toilet unflushed? Or perhaps, you or your partner feels lazy after work, while the other person likes to rest only after finishing all the chores. These are just a tiny part of the different shortcomings that we all come with. You may think you can definitely handle these things, but these shortcomings are actually the biggest reasons why relationships and marriages fail!
Can you handle each other’s likes and dislikes?
Over times, little details like likes and dislikes can make sharing together time an unbearable pain. He likes watching the game, while she likes watching a TV show? Or do you like Chinese food while your partner likes Zulu food? While dating, these differences seem cute and adorable, but in a marriage, these are not cute acts that happen once in a while. You have to deal with it every single day. And it’s left to both of you to compromise and adjust your own likes and dislikes to match that of your partner’s. For a successful marriage, you need to match your likes and dislikes and compromise with each other’s demands.
So what’s the right age to get married now?
Now that you know what it takes to hold on to a successful marriage, ask yourself the same question truthfully. Is this the right age to get married for you? Leaving the average age of marriage apart, are you and your partner really ready to move in together and live as a married couple? These five questions can seem really simple, but unless you give them a serious consideration, you might come back to this page a few months later and wonder how such small things became such unbearable issues that are tearing your marriage apart.
So always be cautious. Take time to decide, and give it enough thought. It’s easy to take a plunge into the ocean of love. But are you going to like the pleasant sensation or will it be a shocking and icy chill? These questions will give you the answer.
