Fighting fair with your partner is something that everyone should learn and prioritise in a relationship.
After all, you don’t want to voice your concerns to a person who shuts down entirely when told a single negative thing, or loses it, and does not even have the patience to listen to any justification.
In such situations, fighting fairly becomes a necessity, especially if you and your partner aim to communicate your problems rationally.
Here listed are some ways to fight fairly in a relationship.
1. Stick to the problem
When fighting, it’s common to stray from the issue because you are reminded of the many things that you dislike your partner doing. But at the same time, sticking to the same issue is very much needed. This way, you both can vulnerably talk to each other without feeling any aggression from past situations.
2. You don’t have to win
Remember this: winning is not the goal in a fight with your partner. Solving the problem is. And that won’t happen if you compete against each other. You may have to compromise on certain bits and your partner will also have to give up certain things. Solving a problem requires you both to work together as a team.
3. Listen to your partner
One of the major problems that occur between couples is that they don’t listen to each other. Listen to what your partner has to say. Rather than ambushing each other with opinions, be the one who listens. It will create a huge difference in the way you both fight.
4. Use ‘I’
When you feel let down by something your partner has done, start off by saying, “When you do this, I feel…” This way your partner has the opportunity to exactly identify and not assume what has been bothering you.
5. Never name-call
Name-calling is a direct way of disrespecting a person. Never do that, especially when you’re fighting with your partner. This can make them feel attacked, disrespected and utterly disappointed. You may feel satisfied at one mo
