In life, we all make mistakes. That means that sometimes we have to cut people some slack and give them the benefit of the doubt because we know we’re human and no one’s perfect.
That being said, we also have to learn from our mistakes and make sure that we don’t keep repeating them.
Going back to someone who has repeatedly mistreated, hurt, or disrespected you over and over again is insane.
Here are nine reasons your ex doesn’t deserve a second chance.
1. He hasn’t earned it
Deciding that he’s sad and bored because you’re no longer together and he has no other options doesn’t mean that you should give your relationship another go. In reality, he’s done absolutely nothing to right the wrongs that led to your breakup and so by getting back with him, you’re sending the message that you’re willing to be a doormat and put up with anything. Don’t lower yourself to that.
2. He’s ghosted you for an extended amount of time
People who ghost you are cowards. He wasn’t man enough to tell you what the deal was, so instead he just disappeared because it was an easy way out. If he comes back, feel free to hear him out because maybe he does have a legitimate explanation, but don’t go back to him. The window has closed. He’s already in the past.
3. He broke up with you for shallow reasons
If he broke up with you because he thought you needed to lose weight, or maybe you were going through a rough patch and were in-between jobs, then he doesn’t deserve a second chance. Someone that truly cares about you wouldn’t leave you during times of struggle, he would support you. You want to be with someone that wants to stick it out through the good and the bad.
4. You’ll never be able to relax with them
If he cheated on you, lied to you, or otherwise just abandoned you in your relationship the first time around, you’ll never feel comfortable and confident enough with him to actually just relax and enjoy the relationship. You’ll be in a constant state of anxiety wondering if the same thing is going to happen again, and no one needs to live like that.
5. He left you for another woman
If he found someone else while you two were still together, then he clearly had a wandering eye and was not focusing all of his attention on you. It’s normal for guys to think another woman is attractive, but if he felt strongly enough to pursue someone else, then he’s not the one. This is one of the most obvious signs he doesn’t deserve a second chance.
6. He’s just using you as a rebound
If he broke up with you, found a new girlfriend, broke up with her, and he’s now coming back to you, then just walk away. He’s an ex, and he should stay an ex. Don’t even think about comforting him during his breakup – and by that, I mean physically or emotionally.
7. He cheated on you multiple times
There are times when couples can move past infidelity. However, it does require a lot of work and you both have to be committed to making sure it doesn’t happen again. But if he consistently cheated on you multiple times throughout the span of your relationship, then have the self-respect to shut that door completely. As the saying goes, “Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.”
8. He physically abused you
There is never an excuse for a man to hit a woman. If he has physically hurt you, then you need to protect yourself and just completely separate yourself from this person. No one deserves to be physically abused, no matter what the reason may be.
9. He emotionally abused you
Emotional abuse can be just as painful, if not more, than physical abuse. Psychological warfare is possibly one of the most manipulative and tactical forms of defeating someone. If he constantly made you feel bad about yourself, hurt your ego, or was just plain mean to you, then do not let this person back into your life. There is no room for negativity. You want someone who will lift you up, not bring you down.
