I know we all think we want a bad boy, but in reality, the long-term goal is to attract a trustworthy man.
Try as we might, we all always end up going back to them, even though we get hurt in the process of finding The One.
Here’s how to change your life and find a trustworthy man.
1. Be trustworthy yourself
This is a classic case of being the change you want to see in the world, or “Love your neighbor as yourself.” The Bible had the right idea, apparently, because this is a great motto. To be deserving of a good guy, give off those good vibes yourself. That’s the foundation for a stable and fulfilling relationship because it’s equal.
2. Define what you want out of the relationship
Do this self-questioning early on in the process so that you avoid wasting your time, or his. A trustworthy man will value his time as well as yours. He’ll really appreciate that you have taken the mature decision to assert what your specific expectations are of the relationship. It’s what adults do.
3. Know and value yourself
You should always retain your sense of self within a relationship, and this is never more true than when trying to establish a long-term relationship. The first commitment you should have with someone should be with yourself. That’s a non-negotiable. To attract the right guy, you should know yourself and what you need so that you can help him help you.
4. Assess what trust means to you
This might be a definition that varies person by person and that’s totally okay. However, you need to have this conversation to explicitly set expectations and boundaries. Love isn’t all spontaneity and passionate fights – a lot of the time it’s steady, clear communication, and evidence that you’re willing to put your ego aside.
5. Reflect on your past behaviors
If you yourself haven’t been trustworthy in the past, then it’s important to assess that. Don’t blame yourself, but be open about it, and use it as a learning point for the future. To attract a trustworthy man, make sure you have come to terms with your past so that you’re ready to be in the moment.
6. Think about what you want in a man
I know we want a guy we can trust but think beyond that. What else do you want or expect out of the person you’re seeing? It’s okay to put pen to paper so that you can think clearly and figure out if the person in front of you is meeting all of those objectives.
7. Talk to a therapist
If you feel like you need to do a little personal work or introspection before you’re ready to have a relationship with a new man, feel free to see a therapist to streamline that process. A trustworthy man will see the work you’re putting into yourself and your future, and they will respect that.