Being a parent is a journey full of love, difficulties, and many chances to influence the course of events.

But occasionally, they could unintentionally spoil their kids in an attempt to provide them with the finest.


Here are some ways parents may unwittingly spoil their children, from encouraging bad behaviours to accidentally lowering their motivation.

1. Nurturing mean and violent behaviour

Children are like sponges, absorbing everything around them, especially from their caregivers. When parents ignore their children’s emotions or respond harshly to their outbursts, it can teach them that being mean or resorting to violence is acceptable. By validating their emotions and teaching healthy coping mechanisms, parents can help steer their children away from negative behaviours.

2. Disrespecting others

Children learn by example, and when parents demonstrate disrespect towards others, whether it’s a neighbour, a family member, or even each other, children pick up on these cues. They may mimic this behaviour, thinking it’s normal or acceptable. Parents can counter this by modelling respect and kindness in their interactions and teaching their children the importance of treating others with dignity and compassion.

3. Diminishing their sense of worth

Acceptance and validation are fundamental needs for children to thrive. When parents fail to accept their children for who they are, whether it’s their interests, quirks, or personality traits, it can lead to a sense of dishonour and inadequacy. Creating a nurturing environment where children feel valued and celebrated for their uniqueness can help increase their self-esteem and sense of worth.

4. Encouraging dishonesty

Honesty is the cornerstone of trust, yet sometimes, in the heat of the moment, parents may react negatively when their child tells the truth about a mistake or misdeed. This can teach children that lying or withholding information is preferable to facing the consequences. Parents can create honesty by responding calmly to their child’s admissions, focusing on problem-solving and learning from mistakes rather than extreme measures.

5. Diminishing motivation

While parents understandably want their children to excel, placing excessive pressure on them to constantly achieve can have unintended consequences. When success becomes the sole focus, children may experience burnout, anxiety, or a loss of intrinsic motivation. Instead, parents can support their children’s interests and efforts, emphasising the importance of growth, resilience, and enjoying the journey rather than solely fixating on outcomes.