Trust is the bedrock of strong relationships. It allows us to be vulnerable, share our dreams, and rely on others for support. But trust isn’t given freely – it’s earned.
Unfortunately, there are people who will break that trust, leaving us feeling hurt, betrayed, and confused.
While it’s impossible to predict someone’s actions with absolute certainty, there are certain personality traits and behaviours that can be red flags. Here are 10 types of people you should approach with caution when it comes to trust:
1. The chronic liar
We all tell little white lies sometimes, but a chronic liar weaves webs of deceit as easily as breathing. They may exaggerate stories, fabricate situations, or conveniently “forget” things that don’t fit their narrative. Their lies can be big or small, but the constant dishonesty erodes trust and makes it impossible to know what’s real.
How to spot them: Chronic liars have inconsistencies in their stories, change their details frequently, and become defensive when questioned.
2. The gossip monger
Gossip mongers thrive on spreading rumours and juicy tidbits about others. They enjoy the power of knowing something others don’t and relish stirring up drama. Today, they might be gossiping about someone else, but tomorrow, you could be the target.
How to spot them: They disguise gossip as “just sharing” or “being concerned,” but their focus is on negativity and drama. They might try to pry for personal information about others or hint at secrets they know.
3. The betrayer
Betrayal comes in many forms, from breaking confidence to neglecting responsibility. A betrayer prioritises their own needs or desires over the trust you’ve placed in them. This can be a friend who reveals a secret you shared in confidence, a co-worker who takes credit for your work, or a romantic partner who cheats.
How to spot them: Be wary of those who prioritise short-term gains over long-term loyalty. They might have a history of broken promises or make excuses for their actions.
4. The manipulator
Manipulators are masters at getting what they want through subtle or not-so-subtle means. They play on your emotions, guilt-trip you into doing things, or use flattery to get their way.
How to spot them: They make you feel bad about yourself to get you to comply or use emotional blackmail to get what they want. Their compliments can feel insincere, and they tend to avoid taking responsibility for their actions.
5. The narcissist
Narcissists have an inflated sense of self-importance and a constant need for admiration. They lack empathy and struggle to see things from your perspective. In a relationship, they might be overly critical, constantly need reassurance, or take advantage of your kindness.
How to spot them: They dominate conversations, rarely show genuine interest in others, and struggle to be happy for other people’s successes. They are charming at first, but the focus will eventually shift to their needs and desires.
6. The yes-man (or yes-woman)
Someone who agrees with everything you say might seem like a dream come true at first. However, a constant “yes-man” or “yes-woman” is more interested in staying in your good graces than offering honest feedback.
How to spot them: They rarely express their own opinions or disagree with yours, even if they have reservations. They might seem overly eager to please and struggle to set boundaries.
7. The drama queen (or king)
Drama queens (or kings) thrive on chaos and attention. They constantly create problems, blow small issues out of proportion, and expect you to drop everything to solve their latest crisis.
How to spot them: They have a victim mentality, blame others for their problems, and struggle to take responsibility for their actions. They crave attention, even negative attention, and thrive on emotional roller coasters.
8. The unreliable
Someone who is consistently unreliable and can’t be counted on is a recipe for disappointment. They might miss deadlines, cancel plans at the last minute, or make promises they can’t keep.
How to spot them: They have a history of unreliable behaviour, offer flimsy excuses for their actions, and rarely learn from their mistakes.
9. The user
Users are only interested in people as long as they can benefit from them. They might befriend you for your connections, borrow money with no intention of paying you back, or exploit your kindness.
How to spot them: They seem overly interested in what you can do for them, rarely reciprocate favours, and have a history of leaving a trail of broken friendships or used-up acquaintances.
10. The abuser (physical or emotional)
This is the most serious category, and it’s important to recognise the signs of abuse early on. An abuser, whether physical or emotional, seeks to control and manipulate you. They may put you down, make you feel worthless, or threaten you.
How to spot them: They are controlling, jealous, and possessive. They may try to isolate you from your friends and family, monitor your communication, or use threats and intimidation to control your behaviour. Physical abuse includes hitting, pushing, or any physical action that causes harm.
These are just a few examples. If you constantly feel drained, manipulated, or disrespected in a relationship, it’s a sign to step back and re-evaluate.
