Some people believe they need to keep secrets or lie to survive in a relationship. They lack confidence in their ability to confront unpleasant topics, such as money troubles, or issues related to past or present errors in judgment or mistakes.
However, finding healthy ways to honestly express yourself to your partner is the best way to build a trusting relationship that endures the test of time.
You have to consider confessing to your partner, because somehow keeping a secret is the same thing as betrayal. If you feel guilty or uneasy about omission information to them, it’s a red flag that you need to do so.
Below are 4 reason why keeping secrets can destroy a relationship:
1. Keeping secrets is the same thing as being dishonest
Honesty is always the best policy and most of us have a moral code which tells us that keeping secrets is akin to lying. For most of us, being dishonest is only acceptable when we are in dire straits – like trying to save someone’s life. Yet some people rationalize that they need to keep secrets or their relationship will end.
2. Often keeping secrets creates more problems in a relationship
The more time that passes, the harder it is to fess up. When people keep secrets or tell lies, they often have to tell other lies to cover up the first lie. They dig deeper and deeper into a hole of dishonesty.
3. Keeping major secrets is a form of deceit and it breeds mistrust
Further, once a person loses trust, it is hard to regain it – especially for those who have been betrayed by a parent or former romantic partner or spouse.
4. People are hurt by secrets and lies and this can destroy a relationship
It’s hard to feel emotionally connected to someone when you catch them in a lie or find out that they’ve kept a secret from you.
