How do you know when you are in a ‘right person wrong time’ situation?
We have all felt like we met the right person at the wrong time in our lives, and this situation can be frustrating.
When you meet the right person at the wrong time, you may feel overwhelmed and even defeated.
Looking back to realize that the timing was wrong, but the person was right can feel like a punch in the gut. We are told that timing in relationships is everything, just as it is in life.
Meeting the right person at the wrong time is a common occurrence that can lead to many regrets and drastically change your trajectory in life.
This article will list 8 signs that you have met the right person at the wrong time, and we help you figure out what you can do about it.
1. They’re not looking for a relationship
You feel you’re perfect for each other. You make each other laugh and…what you felt during that first kiss was unlike anything you’ve felt before. Your personality matches and the sexual tension is at its peak.
But your little love bubble turns out to be a house of cards when they tell you they’re not looking for a relationship. Just like that, it all comes tumbling down. It’s hard to admit, but you have no choice but to respect their decision.
2. Your future goals don’t meet
One of the biggest signs of meeting the right person at the wrong time is if your future goals are completely different. Where they see themselves 10 years down the line could be substantially different than your vision for the future.
In this situation, you might be tempted to think that yours could be one of the right person wrong time success stories. Maybe he’ll drop his plan of being a painter and get a job? Sure, maybe he will. But it’s a huge risk to stick around to find out if their goals will ever change.
3. They’re too involved with someone else
Maybe they’re not over their ex, maybe they’ve fallen for someone else and can’t see anything beyond that. It can be especially annoying because you’re aware of the connection between you two, but your relationship may already be over.
Now you’ll try to get them to fall out of love like you’ve seen in the movies. But unlike in the movies, it won’t work here. (Don’t drop hints about their evil crush, they’ll catch on and hate you instead!) Also, avoid drunken texts like, “You don’t know how lucky you are,” to the person your Mr./Ms. perfect is dating.
4. Their first love is their career
Falling in love with the right person at the wrong time hurts more when they blatantly pick their career over you. You two might have even started dating before you realized that your partner has no time for anything outside of their career.
Focusing on their 9-5 has its pros and cons. They’re most definitely ambitious and desperately want to achieve their career goals. But you also know they’ll abandon that date you fixed up for a work emergency without hesitation. You’ve got to then ask yourself if you can stick around and be sidelined till your partner is happy with their career. Who knows when that’ll happen?
5. One of you has to leave
Aaah! The classic ‘right time wrong person’ examples you’ve seen on-screen all the time. But if meeting the right person at the wrong time always works out for them, you can pull it off too, right? Wishful thinking can get the better of us, but it’s important to give yourself a reality check.
A long-distance relationship is hard to maintain. If one of you has to leave town for a job or for whatever reason, it’ll be a road-block in your love life. It might seem like a challenge you can take, but 6 months into it things will start getting rough. Don’t do that to yourself.
6. The scary beast called “commitment”
You, or the person you’re with, may just be too scared of commitment. If they never talk about the future with you, feel like they’re too young to settle down, or don’t like to use labels, it might be because they’re afraid of commitment.
In most cases, the main culprit in all the ‘right person wrong time’ stories is usually a fear of commitment. The soul-searching, being involved with someone else, not wanting a relationship…all stem from not wanting to be tied down.
7. The rebound relationship
Moving on is hard; something most of us are already aware of. While trying to move on, some people find the best strategy is to immediately jump into another relationship, in an attempt to avoid the feelings they have to work through. It all seems great until you notice them struggling to shake off the ghost of their ex.
Rebound relationships often don’t last since the primary factor your partner may be seeking is a distraction, rather than finding love. You’re not going to stick around to be someone’s distraction, are you?
8. You both live far away
If the person you like lives over 4 hours away…is it even worth it? Sure it’d be nice to imagine yourself driving down there to surprise them, but that’s just so impractical.
If you two do manage to start a relationship, it may feel like you’re limiting each other rather than liberating. In an exclusive relationship where you can’t touch the other partner, things go south real quick. The video calls can only do so much.
What do you do if you find yourself in a ‘right person wrong time’ situation?
What can you do if you’ve met the right person and the wrong time?
If you feel that you have found the right love at the wrong time, you have few options. However, it is essential to note that these situations are complicated and will be different for everyone.
Accept it and move on
You can choose to accept that it is not your time to shine and go on living your life. Trust that things will work out for you when they should.
- Do not change who you are
No matter how much you like someone or how much you believe you are made for each other, you should never compromise yourself to fit into their ideas of a perfect relationship.
Two people who are meant to be together will be, despite differences and because of them.
- Understand fate
Fate does not mean that everything works out just because you want it to, rather than things work as they should when they should.
There is not one single person in the world for you. There are many. Even if it did not work with this one, there would be other opportunities later down the line. Have faith.
- Do not force things
A relationship that is meant to be should not require taxing effort or cause significant stress. Forcing someone to do something they do not want to do will make them, and you, miserable.
- Do not ignore the signs
There will be signs when you meet the right person at the wrong time. You must pay attention to these signs and not ignore what they are telling you. Forcing a relationship that is not meant to be is not suitable for anyone.
