5 tips to help a child not to be a bully

Rasing kind and respectful children is every parent’s goal, but sometimes kids might display behaviours that lean toward bullying—without even realising it.

The good news is parents can play a very important role in shaping a child’s behaviour.

Teaching them empathy, respect, and inclusivity can help prevent bullying tendencies.

Children in their tender years, mostly copy the behaviour they experience. If they’re humiliated or dismissed at home, they may act out these feelings on others. Instead of scolding harshly, take a calm and understanding approach. For example, if they’re upset, let them express their feelings and validate them before discussing better ways to handle frustrations. When they feel respected, they’re more likely to show respect to others.

If your child does exhibit bullying behaviour, it’s important to address it immediately—but avoid labelling them as a “bully.” Shaming can harm their self-esteem and lead to resentment, which could worsen the behaviour. Instead, focus on the actions. A parent can say, “Pushing your friend was hurtful. How do you think they felt?” This helps them understand the impact of their behaviour without feeling personally attacked.

Sometimes kids think they’re joking around, but their words or actions might hurt others. Explain to them that teasing becomes bullying when it’s repeated or intended to harm someone emotionally or physically. Use examples from their daily life, like pointing out how calling someone names might seem funny to one person but could deeply upset another.

One of the best ways to reduce bullying tendencies is by encouraging acts of kindness. Teach your child how rewarding it feels to help others, whether it’s standing up for a classmate who’s being teased or sharing their toys with someone new. Praise them when they show compassion, as this reinforces positive behaviour.

Bullying can stem from a lack of understanding or acceptance of differences. Help a child learn about other cultures, abilities, and perspectives. Read books together that celebrate diversity, watch shows that promote kindness, and talk openly about why everyone deserves to be treated with respect. When children understand and appreciate differences, they’re less likely to exclude or hurt others.