Most of us do not see it coming. Especially when people are in love, they immediately become blind to anything that could endanger their happiness – it can also be called conscious denial.
Unfortunately, we will only be aware of what has happened to us when the damage has already occurred.
Then suddenly something opens our eyes, and all the things we’ve gone through suddenly look terrible. The truth is that they were always terrible, but we decided to paint them beautifully.
This happens when emotional abuse sneaks up on you. You never see him but only feel the consequences. How can your mind be prepared to deal with something that you thought happened suddenly?
I know, it is impossible. Then you face one of the biggest challenges of your life.
But there is one important lesson you have learned. You can not change anyone who does not want to change. You can not force anyone to love you by loving him.
Here’s the lesson you must learn when you’re with him (and probably suspects) that he’s a covert narcissist:
1. “I” and nobody else
He only cares about himself. There is no sentence in him that does not contain the word ‘I’. The whole conversation revolves around him.
Even if someone starts talking about something else, he will use that to get the focus back on themselves.
2. Either in his own way or not at all
He never takes into account other people’s opinions. If he decides something, it has to be done in his own way. It’s as if you did not even exist in his world.
You can talk and implore; he will not give you his precious time.
3. He manipulates you
He already knows every one of your features; He knows every one of your reactions. This will allow him to manipulate and control you to do exactly what he wants.
And at the end of the day you will feel that you have done it voluntarily. He is such a good manipulator. But that’s not the worst. No, the worst part is that he enjoys it when you dance for his pipes.
4. He has a double standard
When it comes to your life, there are more rules than you can imagine. You have to make decisions in life and be careful not to make the wrong ones (according to him).
But when it comes to him, different rules apply. All the things you are not allowed to do, he is allowed to do.
5. The opinions of other people are very important to him
He cares about his reputation. He praises himself, because he must be the loveliest and friendliest person you have ever met on earth.
If self-praise means that he has to humiliate anyone, he will do it, because he does not care if he has to go over dead bodies to be the best.
6. You are the only one who is to blame
The blame game is his favorite game. He is never to blame for anything. If you feel bad, it’s because you did that to yourself. He never is.
He is the angel and you are the devil. He probably called you “evil” and “manipulative” a couple of times, even though you both know that he is the evil and not you.
7. He is the best of all
He always boasts that he is the best, that he does everything better than anyone else. If you ask him if he is the master of the universe. He will admit it without shame.
You know that people who have really achieved something in their lives will never specify it. They keep it to themselves and only if you insist that they tell you, they will do it.
Well, you never have to ask him anything, he’ll brag about anything without any initiative.
